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Solie's Tuesday Morning Report: EXTRA!

Friday Morning Edition

Goldberg Attacks the nWo!!

BattleBowl '98

Results by Ervin Griffin, Jr.

Volume 3, Issue 293 - March 19, 1998

BattleBowl '98

Results by Ervin Griffin, Jr. and Matt Benaka

Hello!! First, before I tell you the winners, I want to say thank you for participating in my first BattleBowl project!!! It was interesting, to say the least!!! I also have to say that the the three matches that were deadlocked got no responses, so I flipped a coin to break the deadlock!!! Those matches will be marked with this symbol (*). Now, I am going to do something that I haven't done before!!! I am going to announce the winners in "what-if" fashion!! In other words, there is going to be a brief synopsis of the matches with voting scores at the end!!! It'll also set up the BattleBowl "what-if" story that I am working on for my webpage. I'll explain where this fits in my "what-if" storyline later. Now for the results:

Bret "HitMan" Hart/Sting (1990) VS. "Stone Cold" Steve Austin/Bruiser Brody (1986)

Eddie Guerrero/Jimmy "Superfly" Snuka (1982) VS. Ricky "The Dragon" Steamboat (1989)/Scott Steiner (1990) Lex Luger (1990)/Antonio Inoki (1984) VS. Owen Hart/Barry Windham (1988)* Ric Flair (1987)/Dan Severn VS. Stan "The Lariat" Hansen (1986)/The Undertaker* Chris Benoit/Road Warrior Animal (1983) VS. Bruno Samartino (70's)/Ken Shamrock* Nikita Koloff (1986)/Road Warrior Hawk (1983) VS. Kerry Von Eric (1984)/Davey Boy Smith Greg "The Hammer" Valentine (1983)/Tatsumi Fujinami (1991) VS. Rick Steiner (1988)/Ole Anderson (1985) Shawn Michaels/Jushin "Thunder" Liger (1992) VS. Wahoo McDaniel (1988)/Syxx Hulk Hogan (1989)/Ron Garvin (1987) VS. "Superstar" Billy Graham (70's)/Billy Jack Haynes (1987) Kensuki Sasaki/Ahmed Johnson VS. Kevin Nash/Don "Magnificent" Muroco (1981) Randy Savage (1987)/Arn Anderson (1991) VS. "Ravishing" Rick Rude (1993)/Buzz "Mad Dog" Sawyer (1983) Brian Pillman (1992)/The Giant VS. Vader (1993)/Dean Malenko Terry Gordy (1986)/Scott Hall (1994) VS. Ron Simmons (1992)/ The Great Muta (1989)

Ultimate Warrior (1990)/Riki Choshu (early 1980's) VS. Michael Hayes (1984)/Marcus "Buff" Bagwell

David Von Eric (1983)/Steven Regal (1994) VS. Pedro Morales (1970's)/Shinya Hashimoto

This story will take place after the Liger/Michaels story. Thus, BattleBowl will be story #9 in the "what-if" series. I am going to take a mini-break from vote-in dream cards for awhile for three reasons:

Now, I do plan on doing another BattleBowl vote-in but that'll be in a couple of months. I will announce here in Solie's when the BattleBowl '98 story is up and running on my web page. If you have a question, comments, criticism, or just want to talk pro wrestling, e-mail me at or By the way, check out the coming attractions below

Now Playing: Stylin' And Profilin': The Legend Of Ric Flair

Upcoming "What-If" Story: Rick Steamboat VS. Chris Benoit

Next Vote-In Card: Battle Of Champions

Ervin Griffin Jr. is Solie's resident historian and also contributes to the Ringside Insider on a regular basis. Many of his previous articles are available in the Articles section of the website. Check out Ervin's Pro-Wrestling Fan Fiction web site.

Thunder Report

The program opens with tape of Sting's helicopter entrance from Monday Nitro. The more I think about it, I am amazed they were able to get a permit for such a dangerous stunt.

Thunder is live from Terra Haute, Indiana.

Chris Jericho vs. Super Calo - Cruiserweight Title match - Jericho makes his usual stupid speech before Calo's entrance. The Mexican star's unorthadox style seems to throw Jericho off his game a little at first, but he recovers soon enough and takes control of the match. His manner is just a little too cocky and it costs him on several occasions, but he maintains his advantage throughout the match for the most part. Calo gets a brief flurry in towards the end - he even gets a couple of pin attempts but fails to hold Jericho down. Almost immediately after the second one, Jericho turns the tables and slaps on the Lion Tamer for the win. Cut to commercial.

Kendal Windham vs. El Dandy - they keep telling us how great El Dandy is but I haven't seen it yet. Maybe I just can't get past that hokey name...but also I don't recall that he has beaten anybody. He gives Windham a pretty good run for his money - but then that's not really saying much. Raven and his thugs come down during the match. Raven is carrying the US Title belt, which he stole from Diamond Dallas Page last night when Page was appearing on MTV. We hear that Page has a concussion and won't be here tonight. After some difficulty Windham takes the pin out of a bulldog on his opponent. Cut to commercial.

Tony goes to the foot of the ramp to interview Curt Hennig and Rick Rude. Hennig claims that he "destroyed" Bret Hart at Uncensored. Rude refers to Hart as "Bret the Zitman" - a boil on the butt of pro-wrestling, so to speak. He adds some comments intended to inflame the crowd's emotions, then they split.

La Parka vs. Saturn - I can't figure what in the heck La Parka is wearing. Looks like an apron or something... Saturn allows his opponent to do his little dance before the match, then levels him with a clothesline as he turns back around. That's pretty much the beginning of the end for La Parka. He really isn't up to this opponent. He gets a short moment in the middle of the match, using his flying ability to upset his opponent's balance somewhat, but then he goes out to get his chair and allows Saturn to use it on him. The Rings of Saturn tell the tale. Cut to commercial.

Clips from MTV Live featuring Ravens attack on DDP. DDP is in the studio, Raven appears on a monitor and is whining about how he is being overlooked. As Page and the VJ's watch Raven on the monitor, Raven runs in in person and bashes DDP with a Stop sign. He takes the Title belt.

Barry Darsow vs. Ray Traylor - two massive has-beens go at. Could be a pretty good match actually. The former Krusher Kruschev/Demolition Smash/Repo Man/Blacktop Bully vs the Big Boss Man. Traylor dominates the early going with his superior mobility. Then he makes an error and gives Darsow his opening. The latter is less the "smash-mouth" brawler and more the methodical wrestler with a lot of power - a very good combination. Traylor has his overwhelming right uppercut and uses it to turn the tables. Now the match see-saws, still generally favoring Darsow but Traylor comes back at the end with his "Traylor Trash" sidewalk slam and gets the pin. Tony says they "may" have a major announcement when we come back from commercial.

Tony is still hawking the important announcement, but first lets go to a WCW Motorsports report. (yawn)

Tony's big announcement: Roddy Piper will be at Nitro Monday to make a I'm not kidding...that's it...

Yuji Nagata vs. Prince Iaukea - Tony is still wetting his pants about the "big announcement" - somebody tell me why... Nagata has a huge advantage in experience here, as well as in size and strength...and wrestling naturally Iuakea dominates the early moments(?) Once Nagata gets his composure together he is definitely in charge. His superior submission style coupled with some on target martial arts kicks are obviously difficult for Iaukea to deal with. In fact if it wasn't for Sonny Oono trying to help with a kick but blowing it (he hit Nagata instead), Nagata would have won... Cut to commercial.

We come back to clips from Uncensored and Nitro purport to show the Giant making mincemeat out of Kevin Nash. Somehow it doesn't play that way.

Brian Adams vs. Marty Jannetty - Adams attacks as his opponent enters the ring - that seems to be his style these days. Jannetty never really recovers from the initial assault. Every time he launches himself into the air, the big guy catches him in mid-flight. Jannetty's one offensive flurry starts with a reverse atomic drop and ends with sleeper that is doomed to fail. Moments later he launches himself again only to be caught and dropped onto Adam's knee (ouch!) The pinfall is like an afterthought. Cut to commercial.

We see the helicopter stunt again - even Tony comments on how dangerous it was for the fans at ringside...

Psychosis vs. Eddie Guerrero - Eddie comes down without his nephew. The match is pretty evenly fought. Pychosis has a size advantage and considerable willingness to risk life and limb. Guerrero is the far superior wrestler. Both are cunning and possess ample mean streaks. After trading the advantage throughut the match, they vie for position on the top turnbuckle and Eddie wins the struggle. Psychosis is shoved off and lands face-down on the mat. Eddie Frog Splashes him and that's all she wrote. Cut to commercial.

Raven vs. Brad Armstrong - this is a rematch from last Thursday. Before anything can start the Flock hits the ring and destroys Brad. Reese drags Armstrong over so that Raven can rant at him then turn his attention to DDP. His speech is completely self- absorbed as usual. He then grabs Armstrong and applies the DDT then goes back to his ringside seat. Cut to commercial.

Tribute video about Bret Hart.

nWo Music plays for the first time tonight.

Scott Norton (w/Vincent) vs. Chris Benoit - I expect to see Benoit win this one but Norton will give him a good battle. Vincent gets right in his face attempting to distract him but that fails as Benoit is ready for Norton's attack. Still the big guy dominates the early going - Benoits chops seems particularly ineffective. The Wolverine falls to the outside and comes under Vincent's boots. Back in the ring Norton maintains his advantage with overwhelming power maneuvers but he can't quite seem to pin his opponent. When Benoit finally gets loose and gets his German released suplex then follows up with the flying headbutt. He slaps on the Crippler Crossface and cranks back on it, but Norton refuses to tap out. Vincent pops up on the apron and Benoit foolishly relinquishes the hold to deal with the intruder. Norton grabs Benoit iin and over-the-shoulder back breaker then delivers his devastating shoulder breaker. He gets the pin. I didn't expect that to happen... Cut to commercial.

Wayne Bloom vs. Goldberg - this one will be counted in seconds. Is this guy over with the fans or what? Two different groups have spelled out his name in individual letters. The match lasts about 55 seconds and is punctuated by Bloom punching Goldberg with little effect. We see Saturn jump the railing and look threateningly at the monster before they go for the replay and then to commercial. That would be a fun match to watch...

Curt Hennig (w/Rick Rude) vs Rick Steiner (w/Ted Dibiasi) - if anybody can outwrestle Hennig it might just be Rick Steiner. Of course Hennig has Rude in his corner and consequently Steiner never gets to exhibit his superior wrestling ability. Rude pushes Steiner off the top rope which causes the DQ about 40 seconds into the match and brings Dibiasi into the frey. He is quickly subdued by the joint attack of Rude and Hennig. Now several more nWo guys hit the ring and Steiner and Dibiasi are getting punked. Ray Traylor runs in but doesn't make a dent. Then, to the delight of the crowd, Goldberg runs in and clears the ring singlehanded. He finishes his work then retires to allow Steiner and Traylor to fend for themselves. By now the nWo is demoralized and find themselves on the receiving end as we fade to black...

Overall a lackluster show...typical for Thunder...but that ending almost made up for it...

At least that's the way I see it...

Earl Oliver
Editor, Solie's Wrestling Newsletter

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