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Solie's Tuesday Morning Report: EXTRA!

Monday Night Wars Edition

Volume 3, Issue 341 - July 27, 1998
Several people pointed out that I mistakenly identified Tom Prichard as Brother Love in last nights edition. Of course, Brother Love was Bruce Prichard. Tom was Zip in the Body Donnas and also Jimmy Del Rey's tag team partner. Solie's regrets the error.
"Henson" sent me this email message:

At the end (of the PPV last night) Stone Cold was still in the ring and Brisco and Paterson came out and started to beat him up until SCSA stuned them both - then Sgt. Slaughter came out and got one too.

Nitro Report

A montage of nWo warfare fills the screen as the program opens. It ends with a shot of DDP being carried away in an ambulance.

Live from the Alamo Dome in San Antonio, Texas, Nitro is on the air. Tony says Page is in the arena and "making demands". But first we get Nitro Grrrrrls...

Goldberg is set to give an interview tonight and he will also face Brian Adams in the main event. Their spiel is interrupted by nWo Hollywood music. Curt Hennig, Rick Rude, Brian Adams, Scott Hall, the Giant, Vincent and Scott Norton all come down to the ring. Hall has the mic and delivers a rant that includes digs at Kevin Nash for his whining speeches of late. As he talks about the gold held by the nWo, the Goldberg chant rises to a roar. Adams tries to make a speech but he is being drowned out for the most part. He calls Goldberg's win over Hogan a "fluke" and says he asked Hogan to let him prove it. He promises Goldberg the "ride of your life..." (dream on Hawaii boy...). Cut to a clip of Eric Bischoff razzing Jay Leno then to commercial.

Someone corrected me last week. The voice on the Masterlock commercials is Gilbert Gottfried.

More clips of Bischoff's talk show. Raven's Flock occupies the ring as we return. Raven makes one of his weenie-whiney speeches then is interrupted by the arrival of Saturn. He offers to give Raven something to cry about. Kanyon runs up behind him but Saturn turns around and beats him to the punch. Saturn confronts Raven again and this time, Kanyon gets his Flatliner on Saturn...huh??

The Barbarian (w/Jimmy Hart) vs. Hacksaw Duggan - it takes three hits for Duggan to knock Barbarian down and out of the ring. Back inside, the Barbarian gets mowed down again. In fact he never really gets anything going. Hart jumps up on the apron and grabs Hacksaw from behind so the Barbarian boots him (Hart, I mean...) in the face! Duggan gets a roll-up and a pin just before Hugh Morrus runs in and starts whalin' on him. Suddenly Meng shows up and faces Morrus then grabs the Tongan Death Grip. The Barbarian beats on his back with little or no affect until Duggan comes to and starts wielding the 2X4. Hart's minions are driven away and Duggan then offers to shake with Meng. Meng obliges him by shaking his windpipe. Cut to commercial.

Time for Bischoff's silly talk show send-up. The crowd hoots all through the monologue, despite the canned laughter. Tonight's target appears to be Monica Lewinsky until he starts ripping on Leno again. His guest on the show is Hollywood Hogan, which explains why Hogan wasn't out earlier with the rest of the thugs. They shows some footage from the tonight show - Leno's comments on the wrestling angle. Leno is considerably funnier then Bischoff, actually. Hogan is asked to comment and says that Leno "stepped over the line." He mentions the fact that Leno will be at Sturgis and warns him to back off. He threatens to show up at the Tonight Show and kick some butt...yatta, yatta... One wasted segment. This probably has potential to build the Road Wild buy rate but they could handle it better in my opinion. Cut to commercial.

Nitro Grrrl Fire struts her stuff... cut to the Nitro Party segment.

Mean Gene is in the ring and invites Diamond Dallas Page to come on down. Gene wants to know who attacked DDP last week. DDP reveals that it was Hogan. He seems so angry he can't speak. But gets out that he plans to rid the world of the self-proclaimed "God" of wrestling and issues a challenge. Cut to video of the continuing saga of Dean Malenko and Chris Jericho leading up to the "Last Match."

Tony is talking about Goldbergs pending interview when he is interrupted by nWo music. Hall, Norton and Dusty Rhodes appear and go straight to the broadcast position. Hall has a mic and says that since Nash doesn't seem to want to face him how about sending Sting out (later tonight). Rhodes takes off on Legendary Larry - threatens to gag him! He reveals that the WCW has issued an order that Larry stop "getting in the nWo's business" whatever that means.

Scott Norton vs. Jim Neidhart - Norton powerbombs Neidhart and pins him. That's it, folks... Cut to Goldberg tribute video ending with the catchphrase "Whose Next?".

In the back, Doug Dellenger and a phalanx of security men are at Goldberg's dressing room door. Doug knocks, then knocks again, then pushes open the door. The room is in a shambles and there is nWo graffitti all over the walls. No sign of the Champ. Cut to commercial.

Bret Hart comes down to the ring with a huge grin on his face. The US Title is draped over his shoulder. He rants about being "the good guy" and accuses DDP of using excuses. He addresses Sting concerning their altercation last week. He says that he has respect for Sting and that he has stayed on the fringes of the nWo because of that respect...yeah right...he says , "Sting, I'm your friend." Uh huh...

Chris Jericho vs Dean Malenko - the "Final Match" for the Cruiserweight Title - Jericho drop kicks Malenko in the face as he enters the ring and the fight goes right out to the floor. Jericho maintains his advantage as the re-enter the ring but Malenko manages to get a drop-kick in and turns the tables. It is only momentary however, and Jericho has turned it back again. He goes for the Lion Tamer but they are too close to the ropes. Jericho takes to the air and downs Malenko again as we cut to commercial.

Malenko is down and out as we return but he is on his feet again in a flash and takes the initiative. He has the upper hand for about 15 seconds then Jericho hits a Lion Sault. Malenko comes back with a butterfly powerbomb then struggles into a Texas Cloverleaf but the ropes are right there again. Malenko climbs to the top and gets upset there. Jericho tries to get a superplex but Malenko reverses it to a DDT from the top. He hits hard himself and both are down. Jericho rolls out and fishes a set of brass knuckles out of his tights. Back in the ring, he never gets the chance to use them because Malenko hits a belly-to-back suplex. The weapon ends up on the mat where Malenko picks it up and uses it...then gets caught with it, and disqualified. So much for last chances...

Mean Gene is in the back getting ready to interview Goldberg, who has been located apparently unharmed. Cut to commercial.

Nitro Grrrrrls dance in the stands...

Travis Tritt video (T-R-O-U-B-L-E)

Curt Hennig (w/Rick Rude) vs. Steve McMichael - no doubt Mongo has a bone to pick with Hennig for helping to break up the Horsemen. He stalks to the ring and clears it almost immediately. Hennig re-enters and goes on the offensive. Mongo gets knocked out of the ring but comes right back and hits a power slam. Rude then gets involved and turns the tables. Hennig gets the fisherman's suplex to win the match. Tony is promising to show the Hogan/Roddman vs. Page/Malone match from Bash at the Beach as we cut to commercial.

A clip of Leno is played then Voodoo Child strikes up as we return. Hogan comes to the ring with Bischoff and the Disciple. Hogan congratulates DDP on taking as "a$$ kicking..." then agrees to accept the challenge of a match tonight. Cut to July 12 and the Michael Buffer announcing the main event from the Bash. (you can read my description of that match in issue #335)

Tony promises the Goldberg interview when we return then throws it to a parody from the Tonight show. A midget is dressed up like Hogan for this one.

Goldberg's music plays as we return and the Champ is shown surrounded by security, making his way to the ring where Mean Gene waits to talk to him. They stretch this walk out for a long, long time. Goldberg speaks in a husky growl and gets right to the point. He chastises Hogan and his thugs for their actions over the last few weeks and says they have "crossed the line" by invading his dressing room. He promises to make an example of his challenger tonight then tells Brian Adams, "You're Next!!"

Mean Gene calls Arn Anderson out for a talk as we return. Arn alludes to Ric Flair when he says that his "best friend is sitting home." He puts Malenko and McMichael down for losing their matches tonight then reiterates his position that they should just "let it be" regarding the reformation of the Horsemen. I guess somebody from the nWo will have to get in his face before anything will change. Cut to commercial.

We come back for a little hype then go right back to commercial.

Scott Hall vs. Sting - the first of tonight's triple main event. Both competitors come out unaccompanied. The announcers are saying that the Bash Tag Match that was shown earlier was doctored by the nWo. Hmmm...I must have missed something. Sting comes out and goes right to town on his opponent. Hall is knocked out of the ring but comes right back in and thumbs his eye. Sting takes to the air but gets caught and is on the receiving end of a fall-away slam. But it's hard to keep the Stinger down and he comes right back to get two Stinger splashes then a death drop. He is going for the Scorpion when Bret Hart shows up ringside. Sting drops Hall's legs and goes out after Hart - but is attacked by Hennig and Vincent. Next Luger enters the fray to even the odds followed by Kevin Nash, who goes into the ring and lays Hall out then jackknifes Vincent. Hart has been sitting in a corner of the ring since the attack on Sting, calmly watching it all go down. Nash bends over Hall and gets hit with a low blow. He falls out of the ring as Sting rolls back in. Hart bends down to pick Sting up from behind but Sting lasys him low with a low-blow then goes for the Scorpion. Hart wriggles out of it and bails. Cut to commercial.

Mean Gene calls Scotty Steiner out - he appears pushing Buff Bagwell in a wheelchair. He turns away and Buff "accidently" rolls pellmell down the ramp and takes a spill. Scott rushes to his side and helps him up, supposedly concerned, but of course its a scam. They run their mouths for a while until JJ Dillon shows up and takes them both to task for their actions over the past several weeks. He then says he will make a match between Scott and his brother for Road Wild. Cut to commercial.

Goldberg's music starts up as we return and the Champ makes that long walk once again. How does he stand there with those sparks bouncing off his chest and face? He enters the ring and turns to take a swipe at Vincent who lingers on the apron. That gives Adams his chance to strike first. He beats the Champ down snd throws a suplex then gets a two count. Goldberg absorbs it then spears his opponent. Vincent comes in a gets the same treatment. Adams gets speared a second time (a first I think) then jackhammered into oblivion.

Hollywood Hogan vs. Diamond Dallas Page - Buffer spices up his introduction with a little Spanish version of "are you ready...?" Hogan enters with the Disciple. He seems to have a lot of support in the arena tonight. The hall is festooned with"Hogan Rules" and "Hollywood is God" signs. Page takes a side trip throught the crowd on his way to the ring. Hogan meets him coming in and takes the immediate advantage. Page wears a knee brace under his tights and his ribs are taped again but he becomes a house afire in moments until Hogan takes a shortcut. He then drags him to the center and hits a belly-to-back. Page is reeling again in a flash. But then Hogan misses an elbow drop. DDP comes roaring back. The match goes to the outside where Hogan is dashed against the railing. Hogan and Disciple try to doubleteam DDP but he fights them both off. Back in the ring Hogan gets a running start and runs right through his opponent. Hogan goes for a scoop slam but DDP wriggles out of it and hits the Diamond Cutter. Hennig hits the ring followed by the rest of the nWo black & white, followed by the red & black, followed by Goldberg who clears the ring of the Hogan faction, followed by the Giant who spins Goldberg around and chokeslams him just as we fade to black...

RAW Report

A montage of scenes from the PPV open the program.

RAW is live from the Arrowhead Pond in Anaheim, California.

The Undertaker makes his entrance and comes to the ring with something on his mind. He is still carrying both Tag Team belts. He rants about what happened last night. He demands an apology from Stone Cold for believing that he was part of a conspiracy. Vince McMahon interrupts to say, "You demand an apology??" He brings his toadies down as backup and rants about how UT's actions were part of the continuing plot. Then he says that he (McMahon) is the one who deserves an apology. He says, "You put your hands on me..." and UT interrupts to say, "...and I might do it again..." McMahon ignores that and sets up a Tag Team Title match between the current Champs and the New Age Outlaws. He demands his apology and this brings Austin to the ring, which causes McMahon and company to split. UT stands his ground of course. Austin says he'll defend the titles tonight but he'll be damned if he'll issue an apology. He offers his usual juvenile hand gesture instead.

D-Lo Brown vs. Vader - non-title match - D-Lo makes his entrance and talks some trash about Euro-Disney naming some rides in his honor then Vader shows up then we cut to commercial.

It's probably wise of D-Lo to choose not to put his title up tonight although he gives Vader a good run for his money. D-Lo is becoming the Iron Mike Sharpe (Jr.) of the ninties with his un-needed chest protector, which he uses as a weapon every chance he gets. He manages to dominate the mastedon for quite some time but then exhibits his inexperience by tossing himself over the top rope. Vader follows him out to the floor and tears off the chest protector and splashes him. Vader re-enters the ring and D-Lo is counted out. Cut to Droz's World - Puke shows us parts of his house and throws up into a tub - how very entertaining this all is... Cut to commercial.

Bart Gunn vs. Dr. Death - Brawl-for-All - Bart has a slight reach advantage for this one but Williams dominates the match. He takes his opponent down almost immediately. Williams gets low and boxes while Gunn swings wildly. No contest in the first round. Ross tells us a knockdown is worth 5 points right after the ref tells us they are worth 10. Ross is then calling it even after the second round even though Williams is landing all the punches. Get that guy some glasses... A "Boring" chant gets started during the third round and some cat calls ring out. The Bart gets a knockdown in the third round which the referee immediately declares to be a knockout. ten count - so how do you determine a knockout? Williams does seem pretty out of it and takes his time getting up after the bell but I think the referee jumped in too quick. Owen Hart shows up as Bart is still standing in the ring but we go to sell something...

Dr. Death is being helped away as Owen starts his rant, challenging anyone to come down and face him. Jason Sensation tempts fate by showing up on the ramp to taunt "the Nugget" - turns out he is backed up by Dan Severn, who is apparently ready to take Owen up on his challenge. Severn is wearing his "business suit" but heads for the ring anyway. he takes off his coat so Owen can start pounding on him without bending the material. Owen drags him to the center and puts on a Sharpshooter but Severn escapes by rolling lifting up on his arms then rolling under. He is about to de-limb Owen when Ken Shamrock runs in and takes over. He puts Owen in a version of the Dragon Sleeper until Severn puts the same hold on him. Officials swarm into the ring and we cut to commercial.

Michael Cole tries to interview Shamrock but just gets shoved down.

DOA vs Scorpio/Faarooq - Bradshaw has joined the braoadcast team to comment on this match. The twins are still dressing alike and are indistiguishable again. One of them faces Scorpio to start and is on the receiving end until Faarooq tags in to continue the assault. The fight goes to the outside where DOA tries to doubleteam Faarooq but Scorpio flies off the top and puts a stop to that. Back in the ring Scorpio holds the advantage for a moment then gets overwhelmed by his opponents who are doubleteaming again. Faarooq gets in and is similarly treated until he knocks one of them to the outside. Suddenly Bradshaw, who has been busy intimidating the King, jumps up and runs in to start beating an everybody! Sgt. Slaughter orders him to leave but he has already spoiled the match. We get some scenes from Lawler's visit to Sable's dressing room during the Free-for-All last night then cut to commercial.

HHH vs. X-Pac vs. The Rock - Triple Threat Match for the Intercontinental Title - Tonight is HHH's birthday and the deck seems definitely stacked against the Champ in this one. In fact the match is strictly a two-on-one situation in the early going as the DX'ers take turns pounding on him. Why in the world would the Rock accept this match? Finally HHH goes for a pin and then X-Pac pulls him off. They get into a heated discussion which allows Maivia to get the drop on both of them. Helmsley gets knocked out to the floor and takes some of the production equipment with him. The match continues in the ring between Maivia and Waltman. Maivia dominates but fails to get the pin while HHH recovers on the outside. Helmsley comes back in as X-Pac goes down and it is a one-on-one situation again. HHH goes down and Waltman comes back. he goes for a pin but HHH pulls him off. Now the DX'ers are fighting while Maivia watches. He goes out for his belt and leaves! He is counted out - he loses the match but keeps the title. Smart move...almost makes up for taking that stupid match in the first place...cut to commercial.

Michael Cole is in the dressing room with the New Age Outlaws. They vow to recover their belts tonight.

Brakus vs. Jesus - the "German Superman" proved to be a wimp in his Brawl-for-All outing against Savio but he makes mincemeat out of Jesus. Nothing to describe really. We see "Mrs. Yamaguchi" leaving Val Venis' shower as we cut to commercial.

Val Venis vs. Brian Christopher (w/Scott Taylor) - Kaientai show up on the ramp with a Samauri sword and some sausage - Christopher uses the distraction to get in the first licks. Venis comes back in a flash and deals out some atomic drops on Christopher then whiplashes him to the mat. Taylor distracts Val again so that Christopher can get in one lick then Val comes back and destroys young Master Lawler. One of Kaientai invades the ring followed by Taka Michinoku to even the odds.

After the match disolves into a melee, Mr. Yamaguchi and Kaientai make a show of chopping up some sausages on a butcher's block. I can't imagine what they are alluding too...

LOD 2000 talk some trash about kicking some butt...

Kama the Godfather/Mark Henry vs. LOD 2000 - I expect we'll get to see the Road Warriors win one for a change - but who knows... Kama comes down with a bevy of beauties (his pimp harem, apparently) Animal takes on the rookie to start and succeeds in knocking him down on the third try. Kama comes in and dominates for about 5 seconds then gets mowed down. Animal goes for a tag but Hawk is ignoring him. He seems to have nodded off! Mark Henry is tagged in and now Animal is getting creamed. Ross mentions that Hawk has had some disturbing personal news recently but declines to elaborate. Animal is going it alone and faring pretty well now. He hoists Kama up for the Doomsday Device but Hawk tries to climb the corner and falls off!! Kama gets the Death Valley Driver and takes the pin. Cut to commercial.

Mark Mero and Jaquelyn head fror the ring. It's time to present the trophy to the winner of the bikini contest from last night. Sable is the winner - so what is Jaquie doing here..? The winner's trophy is quite impressive while the runner's up prize is dinky. Lawler is passed a note from Mr. McMahon who has disqualified Sable for wearing body paint instead of a bikini top. Sable says that she is not disappointed because she more or less expected something like this. She challenges McMahon's manhood which brings the owner out to confront her. He is cocky and abusive, as usual lately, kicking at the photographers as he enters the ring. He orders Lawler to leave the ring then calls Sable an ingrate. He reminds her that he was the one who brought her back into the WWF after Mero tricked her into leaving the promotion. He refers to "people like you" as "a dime a dozen" and implies that she is a bimbo and an airhead. He threatens her job but says she can stay as long as she doesn't become an ungrateful bitch. He turns his back and she flips him the double bird then strips off her shirt to reveal (appropriate word) a very brief zebra-striped bikini. Cut to commercial.

New Age Outlaws vs Steve Austin and the Undertaker - Tag Team Title match - the Unddertaker and Austin make separate entrances. UT has some new music which I neglected to mention last night. Billy starts with Austin and is bulled into the corner and flipped off. He comes back and grabs a headlock, is thrown off and tackles Austin. Austin flips him off to get his goat then takes advantage of his impetuosity. Gunn is knocked to the outside and followed out by Austin but the Road Dog lends a hand and they take him down. Back in the ring Austin takes back the initiative and tags in UT who devestates the opposition. A doubleteam cheapshot turns the tables and UT is being worked over on the mat. They are working on his left leg. The Dog has a spinning toe hold when UT turns it into a Figure Four pretty neatly. But the Dog is in the ropes and escapes. The former Champs continue to hammer at that leg. Now they have him in their corner and are punching away on him. The Dog goes for a rope straddle but UT moves and hangs him up. At last Austin is tagged in and cleans house. He stuns the Dog and takes the pin. Ut chokeslams the incoming Billy Gunn. Austin goes out and gets a couple of beers and offers one to UT. UT pops the top and guzzles to show his agreement to a partnership. Then Kane and Mankind attack Austin. UT goes down to help out as we fade to black...

Obviously WCW tried to load up their last two hours tonight with an eye to the ratings. We shall see whether or not it worked...

At least that's the way I see it...

Earl Oliver
Editor, Solie's Wrestling Newsletter

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