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Solie's Classic Reprints presents

WHUPASS U.: Part 4

By Thomas Korosec for the Dallas Observer

WCW MET WITH PROTESTS IN KANSAS

By Nate Jenkins for the Salina Journal


Volume 5, Issue 535 - December 18, 1999
Editor's Note: We open this morning's edition with the fourth installment of our Classics Reprint article on Black Bart from the Dallas Observer. If you haven't seen the previous chapters I would urge you to go back and look at them. In this part, we examine some of Bart's students a little closer and get some insight into the legardamain involved in our favorite sports entertainment.

But first, here's an article from the Salina (Kansas) Journal concerning a protest over WCW's misuse of the flag.


WCW MET WITH PROTESTS IN KANSAS

(Salina Journal, Thursday, Dec. 2, 1999)

By Nate Jenkins

Taft Yates put his life on the line by serving in the Korean and Vietnam wars.

As a U.S. citizen, he said, and a veteran, he didn't like what he saw Monday night while watching World Championship Wrestling Monday Nitro on television.

Three professional wrestlers and a woman - none of whom will perform Friday night at the WCW event at the Bicentennial Center - put the U.S. flag, the symbol of what he fought for in two wars, on a wrestling mat. Then they proceeded to stomp and spit on it.

So Yates will be at the event that begins at 7:30 p.m. Friday, but he won't be there to cheer on the wrestlers he said he "periodically" watches on television. He'll be standing outside the Bicentennial Center, near the south entrance, with a flag in hand. "This will let them see at least somebody is concerned," said the member of the Veterans of Foreign Wars and Military Order of the Purple Heart and former state department commander of the Disabled American Veterans.

"It will be a peaceful demonstration," Yates said. He's trying to get others to join him in the protest, and said he wouldn't say a word to the wrestlers as they entered the Bicentennial Center. He said what he saw Monday night "just blew my mind," and that "I can think of a lot better ways to voice disapproval with the government than desecrating a flag that symbolizes what this country stands for."

Alan Sharp, director of public relations for WCW in Atlanta, said the organization apologized for Monday's flag-stomping, and that the act was spontaneous and not planned by WCW officials. The incident was televised live. "The incident was addressed backstage," Sharp said. He said WCW officials asked the performers -- Dean Malenko, Saturn, Shane Douglas and Asia -- "'What were you guys doing?' We were not pleased at all," Sharp said. "We apologize for any offense this may have caused and look forward to coming to Salina," Sharp said.

Yates said he "didn't get much encouragement" from the Salina chapter of the VFW when he called asking for support. He said only members of the news media have contacted him about his protest. "I'll just go down there myself," if nobody else wants to go, Yates said. Yates said he thinks disrespect for national symbols began when former boxer Cassius Clay, who later changed his name to Muhammad Ali, burned a draft card as a protest to the Vietnam War.

Yates said he is "all for" a constitutional amendment to ban flag-burning.

"Most everybody has the intelligence they can verbalize it (dissatisfaction with the government) or put it in writing," Yates said. "The flag can't do anything to you at all."


WHUPASS U.

What Ever Happened to Black Bart?

(Dallas Observer, November 6-12, 1997)

By Thomas Korosec

Part 4

At 32, Gene Patton is the oldest in the class. He's another with memories of watching wrestling as a kid. Growing up in Independence, Kansas, Patton remembers watching stars like Wildfire Tommy Rich. "My grandfather and I would jump up and down and practice how to reverse holds and stuff."

Patton's relatives are big people -- 6-foot-2, 200-pound types, and, he says, "I thought I was going to be a big guy too, until I stopped growing at 16." At 5-foot-9, 180 pounds, he has the muscled, pork-chop build of a collegiate wrestler rather than the hulking superstructure of a pro. "Tommy Rich wasn't the biggest guy in the ring, either," Patton says. "But he exploded into his moves."

Patton tended bar in Kansas to put his wife through nursing school. Now she's earning the checks while he takes a year to chase his wrestling dream.

He puts in 12 hours a week at the gym, another six to 10 lifting weights at home. "I feel like I can climb the Empire State Building now," he says, adding that he gets so psychologically worked up over the Saturday-morning class that his stomach churns.

They start pulling their pickups or cars into the Sportatorium's dirt lot around 9 a.m. and cart their gym bags into a dressing room littered with beer cans and cigarette butts from the fight night before.

The 44-year-old metal barn of a building, Dallas' creeky shrine to wrestling, is in about the same shape as the sport itself. Far above the blue canvas ring, boxed in by red, yellow, and blue ropes, the belt on a huge exhaust fan squeaks like a swarm of crickets. The varnished benches march to the steel rafters on dirty, worn planks. There are about 5,000 seats here, and every one was full the night in 1956 when Elvis played the Big D Jamboree.

Sportatorium wrestling goes back another 20 more years, to the 1930s and the days of Mad Mike Mazurki and the Hippo. Duke Keomuka and Fritz Von Erich, a post-WW II brand of villain, sold the building out week after week in the late 1940s and early '50s. In a hint at how dirty the business could get, an arson fire all but destroyed the building in 1953. The new building, equipped with "Circa-sonic sound," hosted a true-or-false game with a $1,000 grand prize.

Now, the place is like a coal-powered ship in an age of fuel oil. It's empty except for the Friday night rumbles and a few guys bouncing up and down in the ring on a Saturday morning.

As they tumble and roll, Bart says something about the ring being a tool. It appears pliant and forgiving enough to absorb at least a percentage of Gene Patton's weight as he goes through his warm-up: back drops, forward rolls, left shoulder roll-overs, right shoulder roll-overs, handstands. The hand-written lesson plan dictates 20 of each.

The back drops -- falling on one's back from a head-stand position -- begin to reveal a bit of wrestling's sleight-of-hand.

And it is this drop that the students learn in lesson one. "If you fall absolutely flat, you don't feel it," says Patton. "When you miss it, you know."

Hlavaty, whom Bart must remind to remove his two earrings before he climbs through the ropes, executes a half-dozen correct ones, while Aaron White, trying a few drops of his own, flinches with pain. "It's very easy to get hurt, especially when you don't know a thing," says White, who managed to hurt himself before fully learning the art of a wrestling fall.

Even more insight into wrestling's art of deception comes a few minutes later as the class practices the hip toss -- a basic but showy move. In a hip toss, wrestler A runs toward wrestler B, who turns slightly and presents his hip. Wrestler A tumbles off B and hits the canvas flat on his back. It looks like B has put a slick move on A, but A is the one providing 90 percent of the motion and nearly all of the control.

"If you're gonna one-point, don't go over," Bart barks, cautioning the guys to make certain they don't land on their heads, which Bart calls "tatering."

The disciples run a few more basic drills, then gather around for a little tutorial on "running the ring" -- speeding across the canvas, lunging backward into the three elastic ropes, then speeding back in the other direction. The movement sets up the clothesline and at least a dozen other classic stunts.

To be continued...


Thunder Report

Unfortunately I missed the first minute or so of the program because my cable company decided to shuffle the channel line up. When I finally found TBS, Chris Benoit and Sid Vicious were in the ring challenging the Outsiders to a match. TPTB's goons appear on the platform and Curt Hennig declares that there will be no match for them as a tag team tonight but they will be wrestling...against each other. They are threatened with 6 months suspension if they don't comply. The Juice (Juventud Guerrera) then shows up again to crash the announce position. It looks like Mike Tenay and Scott Hudson are the regular hosts this evening. In the back, Diamond Dallas Page is attacked in his dressing room by someone who looks like Sting.

Page is out looking for Sting as we return from the break.

Vampiro vs. Buff Bagwell - Oklahoma shows up, Bar-B-Q sauce in hand as the match gets underway. As usual he refers to Vamp and "Vampyro". In the ring the match is in see-saw mode and pretty evenly fought. The camera sweeps the crowd and lands on Aaron Neville ringside. Vamp leaves the ring and comes over to menace OK - but Steve Williams shows up closely followed by Jerry Only who attacks Williams. OK backs away from Vamp who returns to the ring and climbs the corner. Before he can strike his opponent, Oklahoma whacks him with his Bar-B-Q sauce bottle and sends him tumbling to the mat. Bagwell then positions himself and waits for Vamp to rise so he can hit him with the Block Buster. Vamp ends up marinated.

Page is still looking for Sting. Mean Gene is talking to TAFKA Prince Iaukea - he is a man of few (read "no") words. Paisley predicts he will beat Evan Karagias.

TAFKA Prince Iaukea (w/Paisley) vs. Evan Karagias (w/Spice) - the Prince's word of the evening is "Sage". Evan gets aggressive right away. This is a non-title contest so I expect the Prince to win. Madusa comes out to threaten Spice. In the ring, Karagias is putting his opponent down but the ladies have entered the ring and have the referee distracted. Evan tries to mediate and gets surprised and pinned. Madusa then slaps Evan after the match. Spice consoles her man after Madusa leaves.

Sting and Page are slugging it out in the back - nope it isn't Sting! Page pulls off a wig and we see that it is an imposter - Lex Luger!!

The Revolution makes an entrance. As they arrive the lights go out and the big gong sounds. The light come back up and Midnight is in the ring. Now Hacksaw Duggan runs in and the Revolution scatters. This sorts out to a tag team match...

Hacksaw Duggan/Midnight vs. Saturn/Aysa - Shane Douglas runs off Juvey and takes his headset. In the ring, Duggan is destroying Saturn. Aysa tags in against Duggan, who grabs her by the hair to subdue her then tags in Midnight. They lock up and Aysa is in trouble right away. She tags in Saturn and he downs Midnight with a clothesline then starts pummeling her. Meanwhile, Harlem Heat shows up ringside. Aysa takes over on the helpless Midnight but is upset and both are down. They struggle to their respective corners and the men come in to a similar situation as earlier - Duggan dominates the action again. Duggan almost gets the pin but Aysa attacks him to break it up. Midnight jumps in to confront Aysa but is ejected by Saturn - then something strange happens. Stevie Ray unceremoniously tosses Midnight back into the ring. Harlem Heat are arguing now and Midnight comes out to confront Stevie. Meanwhile, back in the ring, Hacksaw uses his 2X4 to put Saturn down and pin him. The Revolution swarms in and attacks Duggan until Aaron Neville grabs the board and runs them off. Booker T runs back in too late to be of much use.

Now Sting it out looking for Luger.

Screamin' Norman Smiley vs. David Flair - Hardcore Title match - Smiley wears a football uniform and brings a cart full of plunder - Flair brings his crowbar and headless teddy bear. He goes after the Champ with the crowbar immediately and drives him from the ring. As Smiley re-enters, Flair switches to a trash can, but Smiley can stand up to that and responds in kind. he then starts his wiggle, but takes his eyes off Flair and gets whacked again. Smiley comes back and downs Flair then starts to tear up the bear but Meng runs in and chases him off then destroys the stuffed animal himself before setting out to catch Smiley. Flair is devastated over the bear and runs from the ring clutching it to his face.

Sting is still looking for Luger. Smiley is fleeing through the parking lot...

Sting makes his entrance as we return from a break. He looks pissed. He addresses Luger and says, "enough is enough". He wants to have their match now rather then wait for Starrcade. The lights lower and someone attacks Sting from out of the crowd. Whoever it is - apparently Luger, is still disguised as Sting. Sting dominates the brawl at first but eventually Luger recovers then puts the boots to his former friend. Liz shows up at ringside as Sting turns the tables and gets two Stinger splashes - then goes for a third and tates leather. Liz runs in with a bat but he takes it away from her. He menaces her with the bat and then Sting recovers and delivers a low blow. He racks Luger! But as he spins, Luger's feet knock Liz down and Sting goes to check on her. Luger grabs the bat and attacks Sting as Liz tries to protect him until Doug Dellenger arrives with security personnel to breaks it up.

Sting is being examined as we return from a break. Meanwhile Luger is making a getaway in his Lincoln.

Dr. Death Steve Williams (w/Oklahoma) vs. The Wall (w/Berlyn) - the announce position is way over crowded as OK joins the team. Hmmmm...I thought the two Germans were on the outs... Doc has the size to match up to the big guy and the experience to overcome him. The Wall has little offense in the early going but eventually comes back with a boot to the face to turn the tables. Now Chavo is ringside trying to sell his products to the crowd. Juvey is aping OK's triple repeat style. Dr. Death is about to get his running powerslam when Berlyn whacks him with his cane and gets his companion DQ'd. The Wall is outraged and again on the outs with Berlyn.

A video montage recaps Monday night's program. Buzzkill is circulating a petition but can't remember what its for. Juvey chants, "Buzzkill! Buzzkill!"

Curt Hennig (w/Shane/Vincent/Virgil) vs. Dustin Rhodes - Rhodes pauses to address Jeff Jarrett on the stick before the match gets underway. He catches Hennig trying to blindside him. Shane gets involved immediately but he has no more success then his boss. Dustin gets the shot to Shane's family jewels in but us distracted so that Hennig's second blindside attacks is successful. Hennig is taking control when the lights go out and a character similar to Dustin's "floating cowboy" flies to the ring. He arrives and hits Dustin with a guitar - it's Jarrett. Dustin is punked.

Mean Gene talks to Jarrett who is not impressed with Dustin.

A white limo pulls up out back and Roddy Piper disembarks carrying a club.

Sid Vicious vs. Chris Benoit - this is the match booked at the top of the program. Sid has the stick as Benoit enters. He says that he and Benoit have decided to call the Powers' bluff. Apparently they are successful because what they get is a handicap match...

Sid/Chris Benoit vs. Creative Control/La Parka/Curt Hennig - La Parka is dispatched immediately then Hennig and Sid brawl out to the floor while Benoit faces Creative Control in the ring. He drags in a ladder and uses it to control his opponents but then Hennig comes back and he is overwhelmed. Sid returns as well - and La Parka. The two friends are punked.

Okerlund interviews Piper backstage. He says he will be the "gatekeeper" for the cage match coming up later between the Outsiders and Hart/Goldberg.

Chris "Champagne" Kanyon (w/J. Biggs & two lovelys) vs. Diamond Dallas Page - Kanyon refers to himself as "CCK" which brings his former partner "DDP" to the ring. They spit at each other and then come out swinging. Biggs joins the broadcast team, displacing Juvey. In the ring, Page is in control for the most part. Biggs is announcing that his charge is up for an Oscar (right...) Back in the ring, CCK is in charge for a bit then Page executes a flying head scissors. Kanyon comes back as Juvey keeps referring to him as "Shampoo". Page starts to turn the tables so Biggs mounts the apron but has no affect on the match as Page gets a Diamond Cutter - but David Flair runs in and clocks him with his crowbar while Biggs distracts the referee. Page is out cold as Kanyon struggles to rise and inadvertantly covers Page for the pin. Bam Bam runs in and attacks but he is whacked with a champagne bottle.

Backstage, Creative Control confront Piper and get their clocks cleaned. He walks right through them and tells the sound people to put up his music. Meanwhile Kevin Nash is looking for his partner.

Mean Gene is outside the Outsider's dressing room. He says Scott Hall has been assaulted.

The Outsiders vs. Bret Hart/Goldberg - World Tag Team Title "House of Pain" match - Roddy Piper has appointed himself the referee - Nash enters on his own. No sign of his partner (much as Goldberg came out alone last week). This unique cage match format stipulates that the competitors try and handcuff their opponents to the cage wall. Hart enters then Goldberg is on his way - meanwhile Piper is being attacked by Jarrett and the twins. Goldberg sees what is going on and runs in to attack the thugs. Piper recovers and together they drive them off. Goldberg pulls the cage door off its hinges and downs Nash. Jarrett walks in and clocks Piper with a guitar then uses another one on Goldberg but fails to put him down. Goldberg spears Jarrett but then nash hits him with the club. Hart and then Goldberg are chained to the cage wall then Piper as well. Jarrett whacks them alternately with the club then he and Nash split as Goldberg starts to break the cuffs, releasing himself, and the program ends.


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SmackDown Report

Clips from the HHH vs. Vince match at Armageddon open the program on tape from Florida State University. This is followed by clips from RAW the next night interepersed with clips from past programs as Stephanie describes the heinous things her father did to her over the last year or so. I am noticing now that her speech is practically the same as one that Shane made to his father at one point when they had a falling out ("it's all about you dad...") We cut to a meeting earlier today with HHH and Steph dictating to the wrestlers. HHH says things are going to be a little bit more fair, some guys who have been held down will be allowed to shine, and others will be taken down a peg or two. Steph gives Mick Foley a match against Al Snow and HHH gives the Rock a World Title shot. They declare this the beginning of the McMahon/Helmsley era.

Prince Albert (w/The Big Boss Man) vs. Chris Jericho - Intercontinental Title match - Boss Man gets on the mic and rants until the Millenium Bug makes his appearance on the platform and takes over the rant in mid-sentence. He refers to his Title as the "Interchrisenental belt" and challenges Boss Man to a title match. He gets Prince Albert instead. Chyna and "the Cat" show up as the fight gets underway. We cut away to see Steph and HHH enjoying a buffet spread. Neither of them seems to know who booked the match in the ring. Back in the arena, Jericho is about to get the Walls of Jericho when Boss Man reaches in and whacks him with his night stick. Before PA can capitalize, Chyna delivers a low blow. Jericho gets his springboard moonsault and the pin.

Backstage, HHH makes a crack about "never knowing what women will do" that angers Stephanie. She wants to go out to watch the next match in person - Kurt Angle faces her former fiance.

Coming back from commercial, HHH is trying to prvent Stephanie from going out to ringside. She overrules him and goes anyway.

Test vs. Kurt Angle - as Test enters the ring, Stephanie arrives on the platform. Test is distracted and blindsided but comes righ back with a sidewalk slam as Steph joins the broadcasters. Test has trouble concentrating on the match at hand with his former fiance sitting ringside. Lawler is trying to suck up to Stephanie but she isn't buying it. One thing I like about her heel turn is that she isn't suddenly changing her feelings about those she was adverse to formerly as so many heels do right after a turn. Except for Helmsley, of course... As Test turns the tables in the ring, Steph goes over and orders the timekeeper to ring the bell because she claims that Test is cheating. He is pissed as he leaves the ring and she backs away from him up the ramp, taunting him. Of course DX appears and bushwhacks him.

We see EMTs treating Test during the break. Cut to "realtime" where HHH and Steph are taunting Test again and booking the Stooges in a match against the Outlaws for later tonight.

The Hardey Boy (w/Terri) vs. The Hardy Boy (w/Terri) - this match is predictable under the HHH/Stephanie regime - brother vs. brother between two face wrestlers. Naturally it is a fast and furious, high flying exhibition. They lose their tempers after a bit which brings Terri in to try and smooth things over but they shove her away then start in on each other. Of course they are so evenly matched that it's hard to figure who will win. Jeff seems the more fluid high flyer and dominates the middle portion of the match. His senton bomb is awesome. Both are excellent counter wrestlers and in the end it is that talent on Matt's part which wins him the match. They embrace afterward and Terri is relieved.

Backstage, Tori confronts the "happy couple" demanding that there be no more humiliations for her and her man, Kane. Steph calmly tells her that she herself will face Tori in the ring tonight. Again HHH is taken be surprise and is against the idea but (again) she overrules him.

The Posse show up to suck up to Steph and HHH. Steph is about to tell them what they can do for her when we switch back to the arena where Tori is making her entrance.

Tori vs. Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley (w/HHH) - Steph comes to the ring with a mic in her hand and pauses to rant before the fight gets underway. Backstage, the Posse is attacking Kane. Tori watches this on the TitanTron then turns to help him. Steph stops her by introducing "real" opponent - X-Pac! Tori bails from the ring but Steph tosses her back in. The competitors go nose-to-nose and Tori spits in his face. He knocks her down and HHH holds her hair in the corner so that X-Pac can hit the bronco buster on her then get the pin.

Kane is shown carrying Tori away from the ring during the break. He carries her right out of the building. Back to the green room where the newlyweds tell the Posse they messed up because Kane was able to recover and take Tori away. They get another match with the Acolytes...

Al Snow vs. Mankind - Falls Cout Anywhere match - before he goes to the ring, Snow appears to be making some kind of arrangement with DX. Snow brings a bat to the ring but is disarmed immediately by Foley. The bat lays in the ring as the fight get going. Snow recovers the bat and uses it to eject his opponent then goes out to follow up but misses his swing and shatters the bat on the ring post (this looks really spectacular, but come on, no baseball bat ever shattered like that...) They fight over to the announce table and Foley delivers a chair shot, then a second one. Snow comes back with a shot to the eyes then finds a metal plate under the ring. He uses it then pulls out a trash can lid and uses that. Back in the ring he chokes Foley with a belt then grabs a traffic sign and hits him but Foley comes back with a DDT onto the sign then goes for the sock. Snow starts to rise and see the sock waiting so he bails. The brawl up the ramp then back to the ring. Now Snow has a bowling bag! He pulls out a bowling shirt and puts it on then pulls out a bowling ball. But Foley has a pair of tongs and tests Snow teticular fortitude with them. He then hits him with the bowling ball! They go out to the ramp again and Foley has Snow on the defensive. They fight over the platform and down the other side into the backstage area. Foley is still in charge at first but then Snow recovers and we go into see-saw mode.They are at DX's door and then inside. The door reopens tha Snow falls out. Foley pins him. The door opens again and we see the Rock come out and change the sign on the door back to say "The Rock".

The Stooges are arguing about their pending Tag Team Title match.

I find it interesting to note that with all the controversey, the Hasbro Company, which advertises to children, never has any problem with WWF programming.

Edge vs. Christian - another brother vs. brother match - the mysterious orange symbol makes another ominous appearance as Christian is introduced. Cut to backstage where the Outlaws have joined the newlyweds. Steph suggests that she and HHH go out for some "fresh air". I don't think she likes them... In the ring the two brothers (who really aren't brothers) are even more energetic then the Hardeys were. As before these two are pretty evenly matched and the contest is a see-saw battle with a lot of pin attempts. Edge tries to spear his brother but is sidestepped in the corner. Christian then goes for a superplex but is shoved off. Suddenly, on a two count, Edge is declared the winner. Looked like a missed spot.

Out back the Posse are trying to sneak out but they are caught and sent back.

The Acolytes vs. The Posse - again this is a handicap match - the Posse are handicapped, I mean - they are noticibly reluctant going to the ring - Lawler offers to call 911. The match is over in seconds as Pete and Joey are dumped to the floor and Rodney is pinned. Pete and Joey re-enter the squared circle (the idiots!!) and get their clocks cleaned inside and outside of the ring.

Lillian Garcia interviews Jim Ross about what's going on with Steph and HHH's actions of late. He is against them, of course. He calls her a bitch - without actually saying it. No doubt that will cost him...

Sure enough we come back from the break HHH and Stephanie are browbeating JR. Stephanie slaps him silly.

Too Cool/Rakishi vs. The Hollys/Viscera - Lawler finally gets the Steve Austin doll to work right tonight as the latter are making their entrance. Grandmaster faces Crash to start and bests him. But he misses an elbow drop and allows a tag. Hardcore comes in and loses the initiative as Rakishi is tagged in. After putting his opponent down, Rakishi tag in Scotty who centipedes over for a chop. But then he flies right into a powerslam followed by a verticle suplex. Viscera comes in and takes control of things. He chokeslams Scott then tags Hardcore back in. Holly goes for a pin but fails. He launches off the top but eats leather. Rakishi is tagged in and cleans house. Then all six are in as Rakishi continues to work on the legal man. Viscera tries to interfere but Rakishi waylays him then is ready to set Bob Holly up for the coup de gras. Viscera gets involved again briefly but only succeeds in flattening Hardcore. Rakishi finishes them and then the guys go into their dance.

In the back DX are pretending to take their challengers seriously. Billy reveals that the match will be no DQ.

The New Age Outlaws vs. The Stooges - WWF World Tag Team Title match - Patterson and Brisco could probably (in real life, I mean) wipe the mat with these whippesnappers...They enter to Hulk Hogan's old music as usual. The Outlaws come down and talk some trash before the match but the old dogs show some new tricks by throwing powder into the eyes of the Champions. Patterson pulls a chain from his pocket and bashes Billy. In a flash they each have submission holds on their respective opponents. Then it all goes sour as Road Dogg escapes and breaks it up. Patterson is ejected from the ring while Brisco is doubleteamed and pinned.

The Rock vs. The Big Show - WWF World Title match - before the match can get started the newlyweds appear and cuddle up on an easy chair on the platform. HHH declares that this will be a lumberjack match. They send in DX, the Dudleys, the Posse and various other heel types to surround the ring. Inside the Rock starts strong but is overmatched by his much bigger opponent. He comes back with a Russian leg sweep and a two count. The Rock and Big Show each go out to be beat upon in turn then Rocky hits a big DDT. DX tries to invade the ring but Maivia ejects them then gets the Rock Bottom. DX swarms in to prevent the pinfall, then a moment later they prevent Wight from getting the pin. Both guys fall out together and are mugged by the lumberjacks. Kane and Mankind run down and start laying waste to the lumberjacks with a plethora of weapons from a cart. The melee erupts into the ring then it clears out and Maivia is left inside with Viscera. He takes the big guy out and the newlyweds are upset as the program ends.


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ECW on TNN

Styles and Gertner open the show, send us to the Impact Players who talk some trash then we cut to the opening montage.

The Baldies make their entrance as we return - one of them (thus far un-named) will face New Jack in the opening contest...but lets go sell something first.

Nova is unpacking his bag when his friend Chris Chetti walks up and insists that he is going to wrestle tonight. Nova says, no way, and tells him he has to wait until he is fully recovered. Chris tells Nova's partner that he better do right by his friend. Sorry, I don't know this guy...

New Jack vs. DeVito (w/the Baldies) - Jack throws a trash can full of plunder into the ring then follows it into the squared circle where he is set upon - but it is only a momentary set-back as he turns the tables and ejects his opponent with ease. DeVito returns to the ring and gets bashed with a computer keyboard. Now Jack has a guitar. He climbs to the top corner and does his best flying JeffJarrett impression. He grabs a fork and is about to plunge it into his opponent's forehead when the other Baldies run in on the attack. Angel staples New Jack's ear to his head! Cut to commercial.

The Baldies issue a challenge to anybody and get the ECW World Heavyweight Champ Mike Awesome, who comes to the ring and puts the two smaller guys down before running into Grime. It takes him a little time to overcome the big guy but overcome him he does. Grime is tumbled to the floor then splashed from the inside out. Grime tries to come back but propells himself upside down against the railing. Awesome sets up a table while Grime recovers and returns to the ring. Awesome follows him back in and then manages to powerbomb him through the table at ringside from the apron! Awesome rolls him back inside and pins him. His manager sings his praises until Little Spike Dudley's music begins to play. Dudley runs right into the ring and puts an Acid Drop on the monster before the latter can react and then splits. Awesome gets shakily to his feet a moment later and wants to know what happened. Dudley waves at him from the entryway and gestures that he wants a shot at the title as we go to the break.

Back to Gertner and Styles who discuss what just happened then we cut to the shower room where a little comic skit takes place involving Road Kill, Francine, Danny Doring and his girlfriend. Silly stuff...

Hadaka is getting it on with Tom Marquette as we return. Super Calo is also involved so I guess this is a three way dance of some sort. The match is fast and furious until Sabu limps into the ring and starts taking people out with his crutch. He switches to a chair. He smashes them all then stacks them on a ringside table and splashes them. His message directed at Rob Van Dam apparently.

Impact Players (w/Dawn Marie/Jason) vs. Chris Candido/Rhino (w/Tammy Lynn Sytch) - Credible's T-shirt reads "Got Blood?" Rhino faces him to start and proves to be too much for him. Justin is face planted before he bails. He stays out while Rhino tags in his partner. Justin returns to the ring and tags in Lance Storm. These two are former partners (and Tag Team Champs, in fact) - they don't like each other. Storm turns the tables and tags Credible back in but Candido turns it around and drops his opponent on his own chair. Justin hangs in there and gets a DDT of his own on the chair a moment later. Rhino tags in and Justin is in trouble again. Storm tags back in and Rhino puts him down as well. He gets a two-count. Candido comes back in and puts Storm into a long winded verticle supex - but Storm kicks out of it and avoids the shot. Candido manages to get Storm up for a super-plex then Dawn marie gets involved which draws Tammy in for a short cat fight. Candido attacks Storm from behind after helping break up the girls' battle but then Rhino accidently whacks him with Jason's kane. Candido is pinned. Rhino seems to think it's Candido's fault...

Justin Credible is ranting when Sandman makes an appearance. Smoking and guzzling as usual, he makes his way to the ring. Jason decides he wants to face Sandman on his own so the latter attacks the former with his own kane. Thus distracted, Sandman is blindsided by the Impact Players but comes back in a flash. He takes care of his attackers but doesn't see Rhino come charging in and smash him against the table he has just set up in the corner.

Raven closes out the program whining about "doing the ring thing" in a monologue directed at someone off camera who we assume is Tommy Dreamer - but turns out to be Francine.

That's it for this edition. I'll be back tomorrow with the Starrcade report. Until then...

At least that's the way I see it...

Earl Oliver
Editor, Solie's Wrestling Newsletter



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